Here, So Near
by onemore-show
Summary: Eric returns from Africa only to find Jackie falling apart, but will she accept his help? Chapter 6: Really just a chapter about tiny spats and fluff..
1. You might sway

Disclaimer: That '70s Show and it's characters aren't mine.

This fic is written in Hiberno-English, so there are extra Us everywhere, and probably grammar that doesn't seem right to some people.

_A/N: _This story is set in Season 8. So spoilers for Season 8 then. Sam is still living in the basement with Hyde, Kelso has gone to Chicago, but Eric has just returned home from Africa, having, for now, spent a full year there. It's early in the summer of 1979, and the Donna/Randy thing still happened.

Jackie sat up in bed slowly. She put her hand to her thumping head. Her eyes felt heavy as they slowly adjusted to the bright grey light of the morning. The curtains were open. Maybe she had forgotten to close them the night before. "Oh good, you're awake,"

Jackie jumped at the sound of another person's voice in her room. She looked to her left and saw Eric sitting by her dressing table, looking exhausted, but with a small smile nonetheless. "Ew! Eric, you perv, what are you doing here?" She pulled her bedcovers closer to her, but then she realised it was pointless as she was wearing the clothes she'd had on the night before.

"Hey," Eric held up his hands defensively. "calm down. I was on drunk-Jackie watch." Jackie just looked at him blankly. "Well, you're just so tiny, no-one's really sure how well you can hold your stuff,"

"Okay, okay, whatever. Ugh," She scrunched up her nose, holding a few strands of hair up to her nostrils. "my hair smells so smoky. That bar probably wasn't the best idea. I'm gonna take a shower." She walked carefully towards her bedroom door, she wasn't very steady that morning. "And _get out _of my room!"

"Sure," Eric sighed, heading off into the living room.

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Jackie emerged from the bathroom after what felt like a few minutes, in a fluffy white bathrobe, with her wet hair sitting on her shoulders. The living room had a dim glow to it; the blinds had been pulled down so that the sunlight wasn't too hard on her eyes. Eric looked up when she came in. He was sitting on the sofa. "There you are," He smiled. "I thought you were trying to flood the apartment again or something," His smile fell slightly when his attempt at a joke fell flat.

Jackie rolled her eyes. "I wasn't gone _that_ long," She sat at the other end of the sofa.

"An hour, actually. Here," Eric picked up a mug from the coffee table handed it to her. "Have some coffee. I thought you'd only be a few minutes, so I made you some earlier, but it started to go cold so I drank it, 'cause my mom's always going on about that 'waste not, want not' crap. So then I made some more, but then _that_ got cold, and, well, I guess you can see the pattern forming here. And now," He got up and crossed to the bathroom door. "if you'll excuse me, I really have to pee." he said over his shoulder as he shut the door behind him.

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"Why are you being so nice to me?" Jackie asked, narrowing her eyes over her third cup of coffee. She was starting to feel slightly human again. Her hair had dried and she hadn't set it, but she didn't care.

There was silence for a moment, then "..well, you've had such a.. tough time lately," Eric avoided her gaze.

"A 'tough time'? What're you talking about?" She put her cup down and looked straight at him. Eric was in Africa for months, what did _he_ know?

He hesitated, looking down at the ground. "Uh.. well, you showed up at the Hub last night, and at first you were okay. Well, okay as in, you were drunk. You were sitting at the table in the corner, watching me and Hyde play Pinball. Hyde told me about what you've been doing lately. He said it's been the same almost every night for a while now, you show up drunk and fight with him. You came over to us, and you started shouting at Hyde. He shouted back, and you started crying. He said some.. crappy stuff to you. It didn't sound like him at all. At least, not the Hyde I left when I went to Africa. But he was just kinda.. "whatever,". So I took you home." Eric sighed, and looked Jackie in the eye, sadly. "What's going on with you, Jackie?"

"Nothing," Jackie walked slowly to the sink and started washing her cup. She faced the closed blinds so that Eric couldn't see her face. "It's not like I've never drank before," She cast her eyes heavenward, as they brimmed with tears. She was starting to remember some of what Hyde said to her the night before.

"Jackie.. just.. try not to make a habit out of getting so wasted that often, okay?"

"I'll do what I like, thank you very much," Jackie scoffed at the window, angrily blinking away her tears. "What, are you afraid I'll show up and embarrass you guys again or something? Or make a scene by being too loud? I actually felt better last night. And though I'd _love_ to be able to tell you that it was your thrilling company, it was, in fact, the being drunk part." She turned around and glared at Eric, who got up from the sofa and walked towards her.

"Look, I didn't say that for Hyde, or me, or anyone else. I said it for you. You need to be careful, Jackie. Drinking won't solve your problems every night. You could hurt yourself, and not just emotionally. You've really been embarrassing yourself. I'll take your attitude as a signal that you don't need me anymore, so I'm going. No need to thank me, by the way." He muttered sarcastically, striding angrily to the door. "It's only every second day that I stay up the entire night making sure my drunk friends don't fall out of bed and crack their heads open on their beside tables,"

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	2. All I wish I could say

Disclaimer: That '70s Show and the various characters aren't mine.

This fic is written in Hiberno-English, so there are extra U and Ts everywhere, and probably grammar that doesn't seem right to some people.

Thanks for the reviews everyone (: They made my day!

Coming home to find everyone had become different people was.. well, unnerving. Unsettling. Inevitable, when he thought about it. But Eric was different too. The things he had seen, they changed him. His eyes were opened to the wider world, and he could see more people there than himself. And he swore he'd never forget it.  
Though he himself had changed for the better, he couldn't say the same for his friends. Eric imagined, while he counted down the days, the weeks, and the months until he could come home, that a year would make the group that much wiser, that much more mature. Ha. How could he have been so stupid? If he was someone else and he heard himself say that, he would have thought he'd never have been a part of that group at all.

But if there was one person he thought, personality wise, had no way to go but up, that was Jackie. Except for a couple of occasions, they never really got along. He didn't see any of her supposed good points. And here he was, disregarding all the name calling and bitchiness (not to mention letting him fall off the water tower) of the past to try and help her, but she just pushed him away.

Hyde was such a jerk. He was probably the only person who actually saw what was happening to Jackie, but he didn't even try. He just dismissed it as funny, that she blew it and then couldn't get over her own mistake. Then he kicked her when she was down, making it worse by getting her annoyed so she'd say the stupidest things, robbing herself of any dignity she still had. Though that couldn't have been a lot, because, as Eric found out from a smirking Hyde, Jackie tended to make her drunken confrontations very public.

Even Donna, Jackie's best friend, didn't have a clue what was going on. Eric had learnt of her dating this new guy for a while, until a day or so before he got back. Apparently they were pretty close, so maybe Donna was just too busy with that relationship to notice Jackie.

Eric was confused about what would happen with him and Donna. He had only been back a few days, but everything with Donna was very vague. They had kissed, they'd sat on the car and talked for a while, but that was all. Eric was prepared to make their plans together; he figured they'd go to school together in September, and get an apartment, but Donna had it all figured out.

A day ago, she had left to go on the 'WFPP On the Road' tour to Florida for the summer, and when she got back, she'd be packing up to go to Madison. Alone. There had been no time for them to talk about anything, not properly anyway. There were always other people in the way, Red and Kitty, or Hyde and Sam. Fez was spending the summer with Kelso in Chicago, so they weren't _in the way_, but they picked the worst times to ring.

Eric wasn't even sure how he felt about her anymore. I mean, sure, he thought about her every day. Every crappy day that he was away from home. But the Donna he thought about was some sort of perfect Donna, with a golden halo at a weird angle (she wasn't _that _good) above her head and a sash that read "Best Girlfriend Ever". He was clinging onto the good memories he had of her, and choosing to ignore the rest. And here he was, back home, with this other Donna, who makes plans for her life without him, dates other guys (shouldn't she have known that he didn't really mean it about breaking up? Or was he asking too much of her to throw psychic into the bargain too?) and who won't just.. stay the same.

There was nothing he could do but wait until she came back. This discussion they needed to have probably wasn't something to be done over the phone. For the moment, he was just going to pretend everything was as it was before he had gone to Africa.

Deciding that it was best not to go out of his way to make Jackie his problem, Eric ignored the fact that the weekend passed by without any word from her. Well, why would she come over? Fez, Donna and Kelso were all out of town. It's not like she and Hyde were friends. She didn't get on with Sam, understandably. And the idea of Jackie and himself being friends, and hanging out alone together in the basement was almost laughable.

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At 2AM on a dark, misty Monday morning, Eric found himself wandering around the town centre of Point Place. He was still messed up from the jet lag, and had slept for a lot of Sunday. He strolled up the main street, past all the shops which had shut for the nights hours ago. If he looked up, directly above his head, he could see parts the sky, not yet devoured by the mist. They was clear, and he could see every single star. The night was quiet, but that's just how he wanted it tonight. It complimented nicely the quietness in his head.

Suddenly, he heard a rough voice shout from the door of the bar across the road; "Look lady, it's closing time, now GET OUT!"

"Bu' I'm not finished!" A small figured answered back, trying to squeeze past the man and back inside the musty looking bar. She was in the shadows, but Eric could tell from her voice that it was Jackie.

"I mean it lady!" The man sneered, as he pushed her to the ground and went back inside, locking the door behind him with the jingle of a key and the snap of a padlock.

Eric crossed the road to where she sat, with her head in her hands. "Jackie? What are you doing here?" He asked gently. She looked up, startled, when she heard his voice, and took the hand he offered to help her to her feet.

"Eric!" Jackie smiled all too brightly. "I was jus' in tha' bar, buyin' lossov 'spensive drinks, and now I don' feel well.." She slurred, laughing at her own attempts to regain her balance. Jackie let go of Eric's hand suddenly, and slipped back down on the ground. He took her hand tighter this time, pulled her up, and bent down to get a look at her face.

"Let's get you home, okay?" Eric turned her until she faced forward, held onto her with both arms to keep her upright, and calmly steered her up the road. In a matter of seconds, everything had changed, and the night wasn't so quiet anymore.

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"You know what Eric?" Jackie whispered. They were lying on her bed, staring at the ceiling. It was the middle of the night, and Jackie was just coming down from a giddy high. She really went through the motions when she was drunk, but at least she wasn't slurring now. "I think you're brave. You're like.. one of the bravest people ever in the history of.. people that're.. brave. You wanna know why?"

"Sure," Eric rubbed his eyes with his fists and yawned quietly, tiredness starting to set in. It couldn't have waited just a few more hours? He should probably stay awake to keep an eye on Jackie.

"You and Donna.. you're like.. still together with your first loves. Even though you aren't engaged, or even boyfriend and girlfriend. It's like you aren't going anywhere. All that time just.. passing by while you do nothing about your relationship.. Most people would be freaked out. I know I would be. I'd be wondering if I was just wasting my time, because I'd expect _the one _to be as committed as I was, and we'd have gotten engaged already.

"I don't think the first person is always _the_ person, you know? If I think about it, I don't really know anyone who's still happily with that first person they started going out with when they were sixteen. 'Cept you guys. But I had to learn that the hard way, after Michael ran away when I wanted to get married. I thought we'd be.. 'Michael and Jackie - together forever', immortalised by a.. big banner or something." Jackie grew quiet, maybe she was getting tired. "Hey, wanna know a secret?"

"Um.. sure..?" Eric thought maybe he preferred the conked-out Jackie to the one who shared her daunting opinions, without considering what impact they might have on the thoughts of others.

"I was glad when you didn't turn up for the wedding. I put on a 'that jackass, I'll kill him!' front for Donna, but really I was just hoping you saw sense or something. You did, but it wasn't the kind I was hoping for. I hoped you'd see what I saw." Jackie played with the silver ring on her finger, distracted by it's shininess.

"And what's that?" Eric was slightly intrigued

"You didn't.. look around. Try out different things, different people. There was too much organising. It was like you were just slowly planning your doom, every time you two had to make a wedding decision. You should try -at least once- being impulsive. Just making a decision like that-" she snapped her fingers "-and sticking with it."

"Okay, well, I think that's enough Jackie-wisdom for now," Eric leaned up on his elbows. It wasn't that Jackie was annoying him, just that she had given him a lot to think about already, and his head was crowded with all these new thoughts just whizzing around in there. Drunk-Jackie made sense. Too much sense.

"Fine. Just remember," She stretched out her arm and pointed her finger in the air "it's okay to.. to _outgrow_ people. You were young then. You're still young. You've still.. you've got.. all the time in the world." Jackie's eyes slowly closed, and she started drifting off at last. Eric settled backwards, leaning up against the headboard. Suddenly, Jackie sat up. "Oh god!" She cried, turning pale fast, and jumping up to run for the bathroom.

"You need me in there?" Eric called after her, getting up from the bed.

"Yes please.." came the quiet reply. There was just one thing in life that made Eric squeamish, and people getting sick was it. But he hated to be alone when he was sick, so he understood Jackie wanting him there. Though he couldn't be sure of whether it was that she didn't want to be alone, or that she didn't want anything to happen to her hair..

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"I'm not going to say it, because I know you don't want to hear it," Eric said the next morning, handing Jackie a plate of toast and sitting on the edge of her bed. "but you know what I'm thinking." Jackie nodded. Her face was pale with a slight green tinge to it. "I'm worried about you.. Should I be? Or are you going to go back to normal soon?"

"Well, is Steven going to leave his _wife_ soon?" Jackie put the plate in her lap, she didn't feel much like eating.

"I don't know, Jackie.." Eric crossed his left leg so that his ankle was resting on his right knee. He played with his shoelace, winding it tight around his finger, watching as the lack of blood flow turned it white. Anything, so that he didn't have to look Jackie in the eye.

"Eric, come on. I'm not asking your opinion, I'm asking you, straight out, if he's going to leave his.. his wife." Jackie stared at him, waiting for him to turn around and look at her.

"Okay, alright." Eric turned to her. "Honestly..? I don't think so. He seems.." He searched for the appropriate word, but Jackie didn't have the patience.

"Happy?" She cut in abruptly. Tears pricked her eyes and stung the back of her throat. She waited.

"'Happy' is a bit of a stretch for Hyde, don't you think?" Eric replied wryly. "But he seems.. comfortable. And not _un_happy. I don't know why you're so concerned about him now anyway. That guy, the one down in the basement with the Las Vegas stripper, he's not the guy you fell in love with. He's just some.. jerky guy with zero respect for you."

Jackie narrowed her eyes and cocked her head to one side. "Where are you getting _that_ idea from?"

"Oh.. my God," Eric put his palms to his eyes and stood up off the bed. "Can't you see it? Jackie, the things he said to you on Friday night at The Hub; that's not what someone who loves you says. If he loved you, he wouldn't be letting you embarrass yourself like that, and he wouldn't be egging you on like he did. This is fun to him, it's a game. This is a different guy. Something's missing. He _doesn't _love you, not anymore." Eric put his hands down by his side, and took a deep breath.

"How could you say that? Don't ever say that!" Jackie, eyes wide, put her hands out and shoved Eric backwards roughly. Then she stopped. She thought. She put down her hands. None of this was Eric's fault, she asked for the truth and he gave it to her. He was just trying to help. She shouldn't be taking this out on him. She softened. "..I-I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to push you, I just.." The stinging in her throat came back, and spread to the tip of her nose. Jackie put her hands to her mouth as she started sobbing in little bursts. "I don't understand," She choked through her tears. Eric sat down again, and awkwardly put his arm around her shoulder. She cried into his shoulder, as he sat in silence. There was nothing he could say, he didn't understand it either.


	3. And if it's just a game

Disclaimer: That '70s Show and the various characters aren't mine.

Once again, thanks for the reviews (:

A week's worth of the same night over and over again had caused Jackie and Eric to become almost nocturnal creatures. He would make sure she was okay in the morning, go home, sleep until dinner, then somehow find her again that night, in a terrible state. This proved Jackie's theory that, not only did guys not get subtlety, they seemed to have a problem with spotting patterns and foreseeing plot holes. If she could call them that.

Every day, she'd hope that if she screamed loud enough inside her head, Eric would hear her. All she wanted was someone to stay with her, someone to talk to. Someone to focus on. Because if she was alone again, with only her own thoughts for company, she'd end up back in that black hole, picking out, and even inventing, flaws and magnifying them. She looked for reasons why Hyde didn't want her anymore. She did this until she was so full of self loathing that she'd do anything to get out of herself. This is where the drinking came in. It seemed.. the least destructive of her options, because anything else she could think of would only hurt others in the long run.

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"Call if you need anything, okay?" He'd say, quietly closing the door of the apartment behind him. Well that was perfect. A good offer. A friendly one. Except, Jackie Burkhart never _needs _anything, or anyone. People need her, not the other way around. If she ever took up _that_ offer, she'd be untrue to herself. Right? And that was the most important thing in life, being who you are. Yes?

After all, poor girls needed people. Ugly girls needed people. Not rich, gorgeous, popular Jackie. So why did she find herself, in tears, following Eric back to his house one morning? Why did she rush down the basement stairs, her light steps making little taps on the cement steps, her cheeks flushed from crying, her eyes hot and puffy.. Crying was never as glamorous in real life as it was in old movies.

Jackie pushed down the handle and pulled open the door. Eric turned his head from the TV to see who had come in, and watched as she shut the door behind her, and just stood there. He stood up and turned to face her. They looked at each other for a moment, until finally, with her eyes brimming with tears, Jackie whispered "You don't always have to go you know. You could.. stay. With me. Stop me from.. going insane. Being alone."

"Jackie.." Eric took a step towards her.

A tear trickled down her cheek, and she pointed her eyes up at the ceiling. "Right now, I've got no one. Not even family.. I mean, who're my parents? The much-loved Mr and Mrs Burkhart.. yeah, locked up and drunk. What kind of-"

"Wah wah wah," A voice cut in, making Jackie's heart leap for a moment, and Hyde came out from his bedroom door. "Oh, Jackie. I thought I recognised the whining. You seem.. steady on your feet today. Not drinking? 'Cause I've got some beer in the shower, if you want.." He gestured to the shower in the corner that was never used. Jackie caught sight of the look on his face, he was half smiling, in a jeering way. She took a step backwards, shaking her head.

"No Steven, not now. I'm don't wanna talk to you right now."

"Oh, really?" He smiled again. Jackie didn't like it. She looked to Eric. He seemed unsure of what to do, but moved towards Jackie a bit. "Because I don't wanna talk to you, oh, hmm.. _ever_, yet you just keep on showing up. And I've gotta say, Jackie, it's getting old. This whole, feeling sorry for yourself thing, it's really wearing thin." Hyde started inching closer to Jackie. "You really make me wonder where you're going to stop. And now I see you've got Forman listening to you. A new guy to do your bidding. You're really making your way around the group, huh?"

Eric found his tongue at last. He stood between Jackie and Hyde, and looked his friend right in the eye, determined to be as calm and quiet as possible. "Look, Hyde, just shut up, okay? Jackie's hurt right now, and she really doesn't need this,"

"You aren't denying it though, are you Forman?" Hyde shot back. "Does _Donna_ know you're spending so much time with Jackie? Oh, you remember Donna, right? Hot blonde, formerly hot redhead, picked you instead of me, almost married you once.. She's called a couple of times. Wanted to talk to you. Lucky for you I covered your ass."

Eric laughed sarcastically. "Don't know what you're talking about, man. I'm just helping out Jackie. It's called being a friend."

"Man.. I hope you know what you're getting yourself into." Hyde took a beer from behind the shower curtain, and headed up the stairs to the den. Eric turned around, but Jackie was gone. He hadn't heard her slip out when he stood between her and Hyde. He flung open the door to the stairs and bounded up them. She was just at the end of the driveway, so he easily caught up to her.

He put his hand on her shoulder to make her stop walking away. "Jackie, just ignore him. He's just talking bullshit, and-"

Jackie spun around, tears streaming down her face. "Didn't you hear him?" She sniffed. "He practically called me a whore. "You're really making your way around the group.." But I'm not.. It was him, and Kelso, but that's it! It's not like I went after Fez, he always came after me. And you, you're with Donna.."

Eric signed. "I know. Just.. ignore him, if you can. Don't let him get to you. But do you get it now? Do you see that he's changed?" Jackie didn't say anything, she just stared straight in front of her, a pained expression on her face. "Uh.. Let's get out of here, okay?"

"Where?" she still stared ahead. There wasn't anywhere to go. She figured she couldn't show her face at The Hub, shopping was the last thing on her mind, so the mall was out.. "I can't face looking at those four stupid walls anymore.. Movies," she said suddenly.

"I don't think there's anything good showing right now," Eric said casually, like he'd forgotten the situation. Unbelievable, yet typical at the same time.

"I don't _care _what we see. It's called escapism, Eric!" Jackie snapped. She shut her eyes, and softened her tone. "Sorry. I'd just like to go be in someone else's shoes for a while. Anyone's. So can we go?"

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Jackie yawned as she unlocked her apartment door that afternoon. "I think you're the same as me," She tossed her keys onto the coffee table and fell backwards onto the couch.

Eric sat down beside her and rested his elbow on the arm of the sofa. "How's that?"

"Think about it. Remember those promise rings? I wanted to get one, and you wanted to give one. It was just that Michael and Donna weren't exactly up for the idea. And you, you almost got married. Lucky. Do you know how many times I tried to trick Steven and Michael into proposing? It must be hundreds." She sighed, inspecting her nails. "It's kind of like.. we're both just looking for something concrete. It kind of makes me wonder why we never really saw eye-to-eye on things."

"Because," Eric sat forward a bit, looking thoughtful. "you were a spoilt, superficial princess who kept inviting herself into my basement," He laughed, but straightened out his face when he saw the look on hers. "Oh, come on Jackie, I'm just kidding.." They sat in silence for a moment, then Eric added "Wait, no I'm not." He smiled to himself.

Jackie frowned, and retorted "If that's what you think of me, what're you even doing here?"

He looked confused. "But.. I was kidding, for the most part. Come on Jackie, don't be like that. Please..? Besides, I'm here because you could use a friend. And you're not like that now, not much anyway. You're different. You're quieter, kind of smaller too.."

Jackie burst out laughing, playfully hitting Eric on the side of the head. "I was kidding, moron. But you're right, I _have_ changed. I don't know about quieter, but I have. Just.. not as much as I would have liked to. In an ideal world, I would have accomplished so much by now. But instead, I've got no job, no husband.. Yeah, that sounds like everything I was hoping for." She lay back against the sofa and stared up at the ceiling, and said with a sigh "I've gotta get out of this town.."


	4. Suffered enough and warred with yourself

Disclaimer: That '70s Show and the various characters aren't mine.

A/N: This is it for me until after the New Year as I've got to go away to no-computer land for a few days. So Happy New Year!

Jackie shivered as she looked out her window at the cold, lonely night, which was made extra cold and lonely by the fact that she was alone again. She must have fallen asleep on the couch in the afternoon, and when she woke up, Eric was gone. It was almost 11, and it was dark out. She must have slept for more than six hours. There was a note scribbled on the back of the TV guide sitting on the coffee table. It said he went home to 'think', and as an afterthought he had added a 'call if you need anything, okay?'. Jackie read it and shook her head. He still didn't get it. She turned on the television and settled herself on the couch, preparing for her first night alone in what seemed like an eternity.

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Eric looked out onto the same black night, but took a step away from the window when he realised that most of his view was taken up by Donna's house. He hated to leave Jackie by herself right now, but he needed some time to think everything over. He was just one of those people; he couldn't focus on himself and his own problems if someone nearby needed something. Sometimes that was a good thing though. Sometimes he needed distraction. It helped him a lot in Africa, he was there to teach the kids, he had a job to do, so during the day he could forget all about how much he missed home.

All through the movie, all during the drive back to Jackie's apartment, all he could hear was Hyde's stupid voice in a stupid echo.. 'She's called a couple of times. Wanted to talk to you. Lucky for you I covered your ass.'  
Stupid.

Hyde was angry at Eric now, he was sure of it. And if he was telling the truth about Donna calling, which Eric was certain he was, then there was no telling how much longer he'd 'cover' for him. But of course, he wasn't really covering, there was nothing to cover. There was nothing going on. But there was no stopping Hyde saying whatever he wanted, and that was the worrying part.

The truth was, Jackie really had given Eric a lot to think about over the past week. He had snuck into the house, and headed straight for his room. He stayed there for four hours behind the locked door, just thinking. By the end, he had come to one conclusion; she was right. Jackie was completely right about.. about everything. He hadn't taken a look around, he just stuck with what he knew, and that's why he ended up almost marrying Donna. And all that planning.. God, what were they doing? The promise ring, the moving to Madison, college, the wedding.. They were all overly planned, and how did they turn out? Where did they leave him? Square one. Square fucking one. Eric would have thought it funny if it was happening to someone else and they were as blind to it as he was. Unfortunately, he couldn't laugh at himself just yet. All he saw when he looked at the situation was wasted time. It was a powerful realisation, but it saddened him. And at the same time, it made him that little bit more confused. He loved Donna, he was sure of it. Almost. It was just.. complicated.

Satisfied with making some kind of breakthrough, Eric headed for the kitchen. All he'd eaten all day was popcorn at the cinema. He was glad to see Red's car gone and no sign of Kitty - they asked too many questions lately, and he really wasn't in the mood to talk. He was just sitting down to a bowl of cereal at the kitchen table when he heard footsteps behind him, from the living room. Boots. He'd recognise them anywhere. "Hey man," Hyde muttered coolly, plonking down in the seat opposite Eric at the table. "So.. what'cha been doin'? Where's.. _she_?"

Eric didn't look up from his bowl. "Where's _Sam_?"

"Shopping," Hyde answered abruptly. "Speaking of people who like to shop.."

"_Jackie_," Eric replied pointedly. "is at home. Why should you care?" He looked Hyde in the eye.

Hyde chuckled. "I don't. And I don't know why you should either,"

Eric banged the table with his palms, kicked his chair back and stood up. "Look man," He exclaimed loudly, keeping his gaze steadily on Hyde's eyes. "I don't know what you want, okay? I don't know what you're getting out of this. But you broke her heart, Hyde. You broke it, tossed it on the ground and stomped all over it. Now get over yourself, so she can get over you..!"

"Forman, I'm not doing _anything_. She's doing it to herself, man. It's not my fault if I find the whole thing pretty amusing. You should get this, you've always hated her." Hyde stood up so they were level.

Eric rolled his eyes, his voice still raised. "No I don't! Over the past week.. I've spent time with her. Lots of time. She talked, I listened. And vice-versa, before you say anything. Jackie told me things that she's never told you. How do I know that? She told me that too. Yeah, she told me she couldn't ever open up to you properly because she was afraid of you laughing at her. I saw who she really is - a person. A small, scared person, with opinions, and feelings, who just wants someone she can trust. You didn't deserve her. I might have thought you did at one stage, but not anymore, now that I've seen what the both of you are really like." Eric took a deep breath, and let what he said sink in. Not to Hyde, to himself. He had no idea that he'd formed such a good opinion of Jackie.

Hyde looked at Eric with disgust. "You'd better hope it's not me who answers the phone next time Donna calls, Forman." And with that, he took off out the sliding door, leaving Eric to his cereal.

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Hyde was still out when Donna called. Sam answered the phone. Eric wasn't sure what he thought of Sam. She seemed nice enough, and she was happy to do all the wife-type things, like getting Hyde a beer and asking him how his day was. She didn't ask questions, she didn't seem that concerned about what Hyde did outside the house at all really. Eric could tell that that was all Hyde really looked for in a wife. He wanted to like her, but he felt guilty when he tried.

"So.." Donna said a bit too brightly. "You've been busy lately. I've called, but you weren't around."

"Yeah," Eric's cheeks burnt as he searched for an excuse. He wasn't sure why he felt having one was so necessary, but something just didn't seem right about telling her the truth, no matter how innocent it was. "I've been out. You know, around. Reacquainting myself with Point Place. I forget how to get to the reservoir a few days ago, so I figured I'd better make sure I still know my way around.. by.. touring the town and.. such."

"Ah. Makes sense. A year's.. a long time. So how are you?" Donna sounded distracted, though Eric figured he sounded equally as distant.

"I'm.. good. You?" Eric closed his eyes. This was awkward. He couldn't remember a time when he felt like this talking to Donna before. He couldn't think of a single thing to say.

There was a pause on the line, then Donna came back with a "Um, I've gotta go now, they need me. Some records have.. gone missing and they need me to.. find.. Yeah. Well, bye," And suddenly the line was dead. She didn't wait for his response. She didn't say 'I love you'.. Come to think of it, they hadn't said it to each other since he got back. Eric put the phone back on the base. That was okay. They'd say it when she came home. She'd come home, and they'd be in love, and they'd be together, and everything would be fine. Wouldn't it?

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"Who is it?" Jackie said quietly to the caller at her door. It was just after midnight.

"It's Eric, open up," came the reply from outside. Jackie quickly unlocked the door to let him in.

She smiled at him. Hmm, that was weird. It was almost like.. she had missed him. And now she was glad he was back. "I thought you were.. 'thinking'."

"I'm done thinking," He looked upset. He rubbed at his eyes. "I talked to Donna,"

"Oh?" Jackie stood a bit closer to him.

"It didn't go too well. So just.. Talk to me. Tell me things. Distract me for a while or something, because I don't know what to.." Eric trailed off. He really did look lost. Before she knew what she was doing, Jackie had her arms tight around him.


	5. Love to let go

Disclaimer: That '70s Show and the various characters aren't mine.

_A/N:_ Okay, in order for this to work, let's just say that as well as getting money for working in Africa, Eric's given a scholarship to go to college. I'm not really too sure how the educational system worked in 1970s America, so bear with me on that (:  
Also, this one races a long a bit. Sorry about that, I just thought it was time to pick up the pace a bit on this part

Jackie somehow managed to manoeuvre them both over to the sofa. She pulled away slightly, to get a good look at him. Deciding she understood him a bit better now - he needed someone around to distract him just as much as she did - she began. "It's lucky you came back, I was _this close _to opening the vodka," There. Now he'd be somewhat concerned about her and would forget his worries. This must be what he was talking about.

Eric looked into her eyes, and her heart did this weird flippy thing. Like it used to do back when..

"What stopped you?" He asked, quietly bringing her back to the present.

Jackie shrugged her shoulders and tried a smile. "None left," She held his gaze for a moment. There was something different in it. It widened her smile. They sat in silence for a little while, until Eric felt the need to break it.

"So, I made a decision. About my life.. and stuff." He took a deep, nervous breath. "I.. I'm going to Minneapolis. To college. The scholarship will cover me there. I'm going to study to become an architect. It's, um, all that Lego and model building.. Kind of made an impression on me. So I'm.. I'm going to give it a try."

Jackie turned to face him, eyes wide. "That's.. that's great. _Great_. When are you heading up there?"

"I don't know exactly," He shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "But soon.."

"Soon? But you can't go!" Jackie cried, abandoning all hopes of staying calm and rational. "You can't! What'll I do.. if you're not around? What am I supposed to do when I'm all by myself?" She stood up and paced in front of the couch for a few seconds. Suddenly she stopped. "..Take me with you..! You know I need to get out of here, and what other opportunities am I going to get?" Jackie sat back down. "Please?"

"Jackie.. I can't."

"Why not?"

"_Because. _Because.. we'd be, like.. living together. And I'm with Donna. It wouldn't be right." He sank down in his seat.

Jackie laughed coldly "Forget about Donna!"

"I'm _with_ Donna. I can't just.." He sighed. He didn't think he'd end up saying anything about leaving yet. He almost wished he hadn't, then at least they'd have a little bit more time together without anything in the middle of them.

"Okay. Okay, fine. But, look, just for a second, take Donna out of the equation. How about then? Would you take me with you? Would you see me as more than a roommate, more than a friend?" Jackie silently laughed at herself. This was a serious moment, but she just sounded so.. corny.

"I-" Eric began, but Jackie stuck her hand up to silence him.

"You know what? No. I don't think I want to know anymore. I mean, if you're being so _stupid_.." A tear trickled down her cheek. She couldn't meet his eyes anymore. She had long since let go of him of course, and they were sitting a few inches apart. Maybe that's how it had to be, in every sense. She closed her eyes and focused on the clock ticking in the kitchen. She got so far away that he really caught her off guard when he kissed her. It was gentle at first, but it grew wanting. He laced his fingers through hers and gripped her hand tightly. She melted back against the couch, pulling him backwards with her. He pushed her hair back behind her ears, and his lips were drawn to her neck. They had barely touched her when he pulled back, and let go of her hand. Without a word, he got up and slipped out of the apartment.

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Ten minutes later, just as Eric closed the sliding door in the kitchen, the phone rang. He grabbed it off the hook and held it up to his ear. He knew it was her, and he knew what she wanted. She already knew it, but maybe she just wanted to know for definite. "If.. Donna and I.. _weren't _together, then.. yes." He waited through the silence, until he heard the click, and he hung up.

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It had been over an hour since he left, and Jackie hadn't moved from where she was sitting. The phone rang beside her, but she didn't register it at first. It was in the distance, some little annoyance that interrupted her thoughts. She finally realised what it was, looked at it curiously, then picked it up. He spoke straight away. "I'll be outside in my car in an hour. Pack enough for a few days, or well.. I don't know. Whatever you think. Meet me out there, if you want to come with me, but if not.. I'll understand."

"Okay," She whispered. She put down the phone and hugged her knees. Vague. But she supposed she just had to trust him.

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Eric put the box of cereal, loaf of bread and pint of milk, among other things that he'd gathered, into a bag and placed them on the counter. He looked at the clock on the wall. He went through his mental checklist. He had made the relevant phone calls, got together clothes, toothbrush, some staple items to last the first little while.. He was sure there was something else, but he couldn't think of it. He never thought he'd find himself making a quick getaway like this. But he was just doing as Jackie suggested, he was doing something impulsive. He took the notepad by the phone off the wall; he needed to write a note to his parents. He ripped off the first sheet containing the address he had been given. _His_ address, from now on. He folded it over and stuck it in his pocket. He set the notepad down, and took the cap off the pen. It wouldn't write the first time, so he shook it. The pen had just touched the paper, the ink running through the nib too fast from being shaken and leaving a blot on the page, when Eric heard someone coming through from the den. "Don't say anything," Eric said, spinning around on his heel. "Because I sure as hell don't want to hear it."

"I'll say whatever I want," came Hyde's reply, sharp and cold, same as it'd been since Eric's return. "Going somewhere?" He gestured to the rucksack Eric had packed that was leaning against the sliding door.

"Yep," Eric looked disinterestedly at the notepad in front of him. "I'm going to Minnesota. And before you ask, Jackie might be coming too. And I don't care who you tell, I really don't. In fact, tell everyone, because I'm not coming back this side of Christmas, and even then, it'll only be for a visit."

Hyde smirked. "She wouldn't go anywhere with you, man. You're bluffing,"

"Whatever you need to tell yourself to feel better is fine by me," Eric picked up the pen again and started writing.

"Well fine. You can have her. Sloppy thirds, that's all she is now. But the _second_ someone catches her eye, or when Kelso arrives for a visit, whichever comes first, and she goes running after them, you'll see what a slut she really is. And I _can't wait _'til you come running home and I get to say 'I told you so'." Eric shook his head as Hyde grabbed a pack of crisps out of the cupboard and headed back downstairs again. Maybe one day Hyde would be able to let her go.

Eric finished his note, simple and to the point, double checked he had everything, looked at the clock for the hundredth time and slung his rucksack over his shoulder. He stood at the open door, looking out into what was left of the night. This was it; he was free.

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"In case you didn't realise, I'm not talking to you right now. But I'd appreciate it if you could tell me exactly what your plan is," Jackie slid into the passenger side of the Vista Cruiser. She watched Eric in the rear-view mirror as he put her stuff into the back of the car. Well, he couldn't have expected her not to be pissed at him for being so idiotic. Served him right, for saying no to her, making out with her and just taking off like that. She was going with him anyway of course, she wasn't going to let her temporary anger at him change anything.

Eric climbed in the driver's side and shut his door. He turned the key in the ignition, checked there was nothing coming down the road, though there wouldn't there be at this hour, and they set off. "I'm sorry. About everything. But I'm glad you're here. And I understand why you're mad, I guess you've got a right to be. Anyway, my aunt Paula told me she knows a guy who owes her a few, and he happens to be a landlord with an apartment to rent out. I called her and she got it all sorted out."

"In the middle of the night?" Jackie rolled her eyes; she forgot that she wasn't meant to be speaking to him.

Eric smiled to himself, he _had_ remembered. "She holds poker games with her friends most Tuesday nights, so she was up anyway, and that guy was there tonight. Kind of a weirdly lucky coincidence, I guess. Like it was a bit _too _easy, but, you know, don't look the gift horse in the mouth," Suddenly, Eric coasted the car to the side of the road. "Listen," He said gently, turning to her. "Are you sure you wanna do this? I mean, are you sure-sure? Because-"

She cut him off with a kiss, and leaned her forehead against Eric's, looking right into his eyes. "I'm positive. Positive-positive." She smiled at him. "Now drive, Eric, drive.. And don't look back."

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	6. And when the real rain comes

Disclaimer: That '70s Show and it's characters aren't mine.

_A/N_: I know the last chapter might have seemed a bit weird, but I felt I needed it to move quickly to get the ball rolling, and also because it was supposed to be an impulse decision that wasn't properly thought through. Thanks for sticking with the story, I appreciate it (:

"Spoilt brat," Eric muttered as Jackie slammed the bathroom door shut. They couldn't have been in the new apartment for more than an hour. Things weren't going very well.  
But it was okay. They had just spent hours cooped up in the car and were irritated, that was all. Jackie was mad at him anyway, and he understood that, she just showed it more because she was tired.  
They only had enough sheets with them for the double bed, and really didn't feel like sharing. Eric thought he deserved the bed because he had done all the driving, and Jackie just thought she deserved it. Full stop. It was stupid, but right then, it was enough. Some petty remarks were thrown back and forth. She eventually decided she wanted to take a bath and stormed off.

Eric hit the bed hard with his fist, threw a pillow over his shoulder and sauntered out into the living room. The couch would be his stop for the night. Or day. He wasn't really sure what time, or even what day of the week it was anymore. The sky was weird shades of purple and orange, with white streaks though it. It was either sunrise or sunset.. but he didn't really care anyway.  
He tried to get comfortable on the squishy blue sofa, but to no avail. His mind was wearily racing, and he had drank too much coffee. Eric pushed the pillow aside and sat up, surveying the living room. He hadn't taken time to do that yet. The walls were painted a plain cream colour, with the blue sofa and curtains being the most vibrant colours in the place. They clashed with the rest of the room in a strange way. The floors were wooden and there were side tables at either end of the sofa with lamps on them, which had been turned on. There was a television in one corner and a cupboard for hanging coats in another. There wasn't much to it, but it'd do. The bedrooms were much the same, cream with something blue in them. A strangely minimalist theme.  
The bathroom was tiled; white and clean-looking, with a door out into the living room and a door leading into the main bedroom, and as for the kitchen.. he hadn't seen the kitchen yet. Jackie had put away the food when the arrived. But he hadn't the energy to see it now, he was completely drained. So he stayed put, waiting for sleep.

He was lying-sitting-up at one end of the couch when Jackie came out of the bedroom in her pyjamas carrying a quilt. She silently slipped through the room and curled up on the opposite end, spreading the cover over both of them. She faced away. Angry words still rang in the silent air. It was just like any other fight either of them had been in. Just a tiff. But the silence spread out over almost an hour.  
"Even though you were just in the other room, I _still_ couldn't be by myself.." She sniffed, edging over to his side. Tears were now slowly streaming from her eyes as she buried her head in his shoulder. "Am I making a huge mistake..?"  
He didn't answer her. How could he when he was asking himself the same question?  
He absentmindedly reached up a hand to stroke her hair and listened as her breathing slowed, and she finally gave in to sleep.

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Eric got up and stretched, enjoying the first couple of seconds before he everything came back to him, and he remembered what he was doing in this unfamiliar room. A noise in the kitchen brought him right back to where he should be. He poked his head through the kitchen door.

"Morning," Jackie smiled cheerfully. "You've been asleep for hours,"

"What time is it?" Eric rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, looking around him for a clock.

"Noon," Jackie opened various cupboards, gesturing to the contents of them. "I got up early, and went for a walk. I found a store down the street, so I came back and got some money and bought in some stuff. Do you want something to eat?"

Eric stood quietly, observing her as she flew around the kitchen, putting the last few things away. She was drinking something from a glass. "Is that.. Are you drinking chocolate milk?"

"No," She said dryly. "This's vodka. I just added a splash of chocolate milk, you know, for variety." Her straight face broke and she laughed. "Yes weirdo, it's chocolate milk. You want some?"

Eric ignored her question. She was trying to seem happy, but he saw straight through her. He took a few steps towards her. "It's okay, you know, if you aren't.. I mean, we just got here, give yourself some time to adjust. Besides, nobody said it would be easy,"

Jackie turned away and busied herself at a cupboard. "Yeah?" She laughed, but not very convincingly. "Well no-one ever said it'd be this hard either,"

"This is just the beginning. You'll settle into it soon." Eric stood behind her and put his arms around her waist. "It'll be great, you've just.. gotta be patient."

"You know, I couldn't even tell you exactly what it is that's making me feel like this. I just feel like.. I've forgotten something. Something important. It feels like.. Like I left my blow-dryer in Point Place. Only I _know_ I've got it here, so I don't know why I'm missing it, or why I'm so worried. Except I don't know what I think I've forgotten.." Jackie sighed "I don't know why I'm telling _you_ this. You probably feel the same. And if you don't, then I don't want to discourage you from enjoying all this new stuff." She turned around in his arms and smiled. "But you're right. It'll get better,"

"Yeah.." Eric pulled her to him and held her tight, so that she couldn't see his face. Great. She was in denial, she was kidding herself that she didn't know what was irking her. And once again, Jackie had hit the nail on the head; no-one ever said it would be _this_ hard.

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"Hi, Dad," Eric played with the cord of the phone. He heard a sharp intake of breath at the other end of the line.

"Dumbass!" Eric rolled his eyes. Red would never change. "Your mother has been worried sick about you.. taking off in the middle of the night like that.. I'm so angry that I can't even talk to you right now. If I had your address I'd be over there this _second_ to put my foot-"

"In my ass, I know." Eric interrupted. "Which is precisely why I'm giving my address to _Mom_, not you." He heard voices in the background, and the phone changing hands.

"Eric?" It was Kitty. She sounded upset, her voice slightly strained. "Eric, honey, where are you?"

"In Minneapolis Mom, like I said in the note. I just called to tell you that everything's fine, and to give you my phone number and address." He wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible, but something told him that'd be difficult.

"Fine?! How could you be fine, you're all alone in a strange city!" Kitty sounded on the verge of tears.

"Alone..? No, I'm not alone. I'm with Jackie," He said this quickly, and waited for Kitty's response.

".._Jackie_?" There was a frustrated sigh. "Did she put you up to this?"

"Um, no. No one put anyone up to anything,"

There was silence for a moment, and Eric could almost hear his mother's brain working around the situation. She gasped. "But, but you and.. you and.. What about Donna? You two were together again, you.. I saw you, you talked everything out on the hood of the car, I was watching you, I-I always.."

"Mom, Donna and I aren't meant for each other, not like we used to be," Eric reasoned, trying not to lose his head.

"How could you do this to her? Hmm? How could you just go like that, take such a drastic move forward in your life without her?" Kitty tutted.

"What? She did that to me first! She took off to Florida, and come September she's going to Madison. She never intended on taking me with her. You might have _seen_ us on the hood of the car, but you didn't hear what she said to me.." Eric decided he'd had enough for now. He didn't need his mother questioning his decisions like that when he was still doubting them a little bit himself. "Look, I've gotta go now, I'll call you again soon,"

As he was slamming down the phone, he faintly heard Kitty saying something about his phone number. He'd give it to her another time; if he gave it to her now he wouldn't be able to get her off the phone.

"How'd it go?" Jackie came into the room and sat next to him.

"Crappy. Couldn't really expect anything else, I guess." Eric sighed, taking Jackie's hand. "So what d'you want to do today? I should probably head down to Pricemart though, and apply for a job. I figure I could get them to call someone at the Point Place branch as a reference. Working there will do for now anyway, if I combine it with the money I got from last year,"

"Do you have to do that today? I thought we could have some fun, take a look around, do nothing for a little while. I mean, we'll have to go back on the road in a few days anyway, to get the rest of our stuff. We might as well have fun while we've got time," Jackie swung her legs up onto the couch and lay down across Eric's lap.

He smiled down at her. "Yeah, sounds good. Pricemart can wait. So, what did you have in mind?"

"Oh," Jackie leaned up and put her arms around Eric's neck, giving him a sly look. "You know, stuff."

Eric chuckled softly as he positioned her more comfortably on his lap. He looked into her soft brown eyes. "Someone told me you were beautiful once, but I didn't believe them. I wish I'd looked closer then,"

"Hmm. Is that a compliment? Because if it is, I'm gonna have to teach you how to give the kind of compliment Burkhart women are used to. Well, _no-one_ ever told me you were hot, but I guess I kinda see it now. Sort of." She threw back her head and laughed at the face he made.

"Is that so, Miss Burkhart?" he teased, and, raising an eyebrow, he lifted her closer and captured her in a kiss.

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End file.
